Wednesday, February 28, 2007
T13: New and Improved
Often when purchasing our usual grocery list of items we pick up a product that has "New and Improved" on it's label. Sometimes this can be a good thing such as when your dish detergent suddenly has a new super grease busting power. Sometimes this can be a bad thing like the year Coca-Cola came out with their New Coke formula.

Below is my list of 13 product improvements I either liked, disliked or would like to see.

1. Bryer's Ice Cream. When they introduced their new convenient and easy to store cartons they failed to mention that they was skimping on the ice cream. What used to be a 1/2 Gallon is now listed as 1.75 Quarts.

2. Folger's Coffee. They now have this easy pull tab can and it rocks! No more fighting with the can opener and you still get to appreciate that original puff of aroma once the vacuum seal is broken.

3. Hershey's Kisses. You can't go wrong with chocolate in my book. For the past few months I've been finding interesting bags of Coffee, Cherry, Orange, Caramel and recently Coconut foil wrapped goodies. I'm impressed!!

4. McDonalds Condiments. This suggestion can be towards any fast food restaurant. They need to somehow contract with Cheeze-Whiz and get packets of the stuff to go with the ketchup, mayo, mustard and BBQ sauce. I know, I know, fast food is fattening as it is - but if you're gonna go and eat saturated fats a few more squirts can't kill you.

5. Girl Scout Cookies. Okay girls, stop messin' with the program. There is no need for these nasty tasting new flavors just stick to the tried and true basics. Thin Mints, Tre-foils, Peanut Butter Do-Si-Dos and Samoas.

6. Diet Pepsi. It's no secret that I'm a Classic Coca-Cola fan and diet colas just don't cut it at all. However, Diet Pepsi's new Jazz line with Strawberries & Cream and Cherry French Vanilla flavors had me fooled. These are actually very good. So good, you don't even taste the "diet" word in them.

7. Sudafed PE Strips. I picked a box of these up the other day because the elderly lady that I care for had herself a terrible cold. So did I. I didn't have time to fill out all that anti-meth lab paperwork for cold medicine so I grabbed a box of these. A simple Cherry Menthol thin strip that you put on your tongue and it dissolves instantly. It WORKS instantly too!! Mrs. Dell declared this product a miracle.

8. Quatro Razor. Okay, I'll admit it the Mach III razor and the feminine version of Venus are the greatest razors ever made. But do we really need another blade in there?

9. Kraft Macaroni & Cheese. They've been plugging on the TeeVee for 10 years now that they are adding more and more and more cheese to their box. As far as I can tell the packet of macaroni and the packet of cheese within the blue box has remained the same. I'm not buying it.

10. Fisher Price Little People. I know the old antique versions may have been swallowed by a few kids, but they were the best! Now you only get one or two in a play set and they're decorated so much so, that imagination is no longer needed. I liked the old fashioned Little Peeps.

11. Kibbles 'n Bits Dog Food. Now with new and improved meatier chunks. Our Bobo gets a bit anxious when anything is out of order or ordinary. Including his food, especially now that it has the same smell and texture as Play-Doh.

12. The New Blogger. Need I say more?

13. Potato Chips. All potato chips, cheesy poofs, Cheerios, Cocoa Pebbles and similar products should come inside a Ziploc type of storage bag. Sure it may put the Chip Clips peeps out of business but this tiny little improvement will keep my munchies fresher longer.


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 8:03 PM   19 comments
Do You Have Issues?: Stupid is as Stupid Does.
Miz Margie, I want to know why a lot of people think that Southerns are big, dumb, and stupid? All areas of this country have persons who match that description. In most of the movies, and tv shows, we are stereotyped as bumbling boobs (double breasted) or hayseeds (straw hats) with B. S. (BBQ Sauce) for brains. I know you like living in the South, so what's your take on this?

You're absolutely right. Big, dumb and stupid peeps can be found all across America. Unfortunately you are also right on how Southerners are frequently stereotyped in this manner. Movies such as "Deliverance", TV Sitcoms, some Country music songs and even Jeff Foxworthy is a self made millionaire simply by pickin' on the Redneck culture.

Which reminds me of the "Blue Collar Comedy Tour" and makes me question that if there is an intelligent anthropological reason for this. The reason being, what the majority of a large area of people have done for a living over a course of time. (For example; Agricultural, Ranching, Coal Mining, Manufacturing, etc.)

I'm from New Jersey, the Garden State and when asked will always emphasis "South Jersey". I do so to separate myself from the city folk up North and the New Yorkers. Not that there is anything wrong with them or me for that matter, but our cultures are drastically different. I never seen a taxi cab or city bus for the first 18 years of my life. Growing up surrounded by miles and miles of blueberry farms, corn fields, peach trees, dairy farms and pine trees had kept me ignorant of so much of the world.

It is wonderful and honorable to be simple but unfortunately it is often correlated with being stupid. Maybe I don't have a clue on stem cell research or the latest theory on Quantum Physics - but what are the chances that Stephen Hawking knows how to cut brake rotors? Did Albert Einstein know how to build a Double Whopper with cheese? Does Senator John Kerry know how to rebuild a carburettor?

Probably not but they depend on others to know these things just as others depend on them to find a cure for cancer or handle diplomatic relations to bring peace to our country, world and children. They don't need to know how the corn was grown, harvested and put into their frozen Green Giant Veggie Blend side dish.

The South doesn't have the best Ivy League Schools or even the best of national school testing scores. What we have is the best of real, down home kind of people.

Savannah, where a "pigeon-toed only child with a receding chin and a you-leave-me-alone-or-I'll-bite-you complex" girl named Flannery O'Connor became one of the most important voices in American Woman's literature. Where Clarence Thomas was raised by a poor single mother and rose to become a Supreme Court Justice. Where Juliette Gordon Low founded the US Girl Scouts and helped to empower young ladies to be all they wanted to be.

They are just a few of the many wonderful, famous and talented people that have roots in the South. Fed on corn, shaded by straw hats and who liked their chicken dripping with Johnny Harris' sauce.

My take on the whole thing, "Stupid is as Stupid Does."

(Do you have issues? If so write in and vent here! All personal information is kept confidential and questions may be edited to exclude identifiable information. )


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 1:16 PM   2 comments
Tuesday, February 27, 2007
Tinfoil Chef: "Cream of Wheat Griddle Cakes"
Welcome again to "Tinfoil Chef " where I'd like to feature healthy recipes for square meals on meager pockets. Have you ever been in the mood for breakfast when it was supper time? Maybe you've stopped at Denny's or IHOP after breakfast hours and caved in for a Grand Slam Breakfast for lunch.

This weeks recipe I made up for an elderly couple that I care for here in Savannah who both have special diets. These Griddle Cakes or pancakes came out so yummy that I have to share.

There is also an extra bonus as you can make up a double batch and freeze little mini stacks of four cakes in a Ziploc Sandwich bag as individual/microwaveable servings. A great time saver for those on the go and a very economic way to put a hot breakfast on the table.

-Non-stick spray
-1 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
-1 1/2 cups milk (your choice buttermilk, 2%, Soy, Lactaid)
-1/3 cup instant Cream of Wheat (dry)
-1 egg
-1/3 cup sugar
-1 tsp baking powder
-1 tsp baking soda
-1 tsp Vanilla

Preheat a skillet over medium heat and apply a spritz of nonstick cooking spray. Combine all ingredients in a large bowl until smooth. Pour the batter by 1/4 cup portions into the hot pan and cook pancakes for 1-2 minutes per side or until brown. Repeat with remaining batter. Serves 4-6

Total Cost: $2.16
approximately .36 cents a person.
Prep Time: 20 minutes

Great served with fresh fruit or berries, maple syrup and butter or make a Grand Slam breakfast out of it with eggs, bacon, sausage and all the fixin's.


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 6:59 AM   4 comments
Monday, February 26, 2007
Protecting our Children on the Net
I was tagged by Practical Chick who was tagged by Dari Donovan to participate in Project Blogger Power. Blogger Power is a campaign to safeguard the internet for children from pornography.

It's not a campaign against porn, nor does it want to restrict free speech or artistic expression. This is simply a common sense request to get the adult web site webmasters a shout to employ a little responsibility and understanding. To meet concerned parents half-way on providing password protected logins for explicit material, no more free clips, free tours or free pics and asking them to actively support and sign up for .xxx domains when available.

So without further adieu:

A Request To All Webmasters Of Adult Sites:

"Please require a password-protected login before allowing even free access to explicit adult content. We understand that selling porn is your business and we respect your right to make a legal living. But understand our legitimate concerns and work with us. You already have the “warning adult content” on your websites. Yet kids, who are not legal customers of your product, ignore the warning. So to prevent them from having direct access to explicit images, texts and sounds, the simplest way is to have a password-protected login. No more “free tours” before a visitor supplies basic information."

My Advice To All Parents:

If it has happened to you, as I'm sure it has - porn advertising in your email inbox or accidentally stumbling upon a site that wasn't what you thought it was - it WILL also happen to your children while online. Particularly if adult sites remain irresponsible by allowing anonymous sneak peeks and promotions. Here are five ways that I will try to implement concerning Squirt and her internet use when the time comes.

1. Trying to be there at all times so that when it does happen, we can have one of the many talks Moms tend to have with their children about such matters. There are ways to restrict internet access on your home PC by password so your child can still use MS Word or other software offline for homework assignments.

2. Downloading a Net Nanny type of filter to screen sites for explicit material.

3. Establishing an alpha-numeric email address when the time comes as well as employing any other techniques to counter spam. I may even go as far as having her email activities done only on my computer so I can monitor them.

4. When the time comes she can blog, but I will not allow her to use Myspace. We will talk about the dangers of social networking and I will insist on anonymity with no sharing personal information as in location, photos, real names of either people or places. She will have to employ creativity in which I highly would encourage anyway and insist on editing before she publishes.

5. Internet pornography isn't something our parents had to worry about but it is inevitable for us. Be honest and be fair. You may remember the days when Playboy Rags were sold behind the counter of the 7-11, or when cigarettes were sold out of vending machines. You may also remember how more curious you were over a thing when it was kept such a big secret. If it's a big secret than it must be a big deal. So be cool, it is a big deal but be honest about it. Answer their questions, discuss things that may have happened. Soon, to a kid it won't be such a big deal anymore. Just a stupid annoying internet thing.

I am supposed to tag 20 other bloggers. I could tag only three like Practical Chick has, but I'm very afraid of tagging people now. The last time I did I disrupted Dr. John so much that he posted my tag instead of posting the meaning of life and I've been wandering around confused and without direction ever since.

If you feel moved to do so take a peek at Project Blogger Power than go ahead and run with the torch to make a difference. Thanks!


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 8:49 AM   7 comments
Sunday, February 25, 2007
Fast Food From The God Box: "Marriage Issues"
Marital disagreements can range from money, sex, in-laws, children, and household responsibilities. Many couples believe that if they argue about these things they're automatically headed for divorce. Conflict doesn't have to ruin relationships, you can carve your future together by how you deal with your issues.

God didn't make a mistake when he included anger as part of our emotional make-up; but He does wants us to handle it right (Ephesians 4:26 ) If it feels like marital disagreements are eroding your marriage it's time to think, listen, and calm down before you react.

(1) Think about your history together.
Chances are you started out as good friends. So ask yourself how you'd treat your best friend if you were having relationship issues. Not by being critical and defensive, right? What initially attracted you to one another anyhow? When did you fall in love? How did you act when things were good? Recall and rehearse your best moments.

(2) Listen and keep your thoughts focused on what God can do.
Zero in on your mate's best qualities, then start believing that God can turn your relationship around. Remember, you have more ability than you realize to change your perception of your partner. So concentrate on all the things in your marriage that are "of good report" (Philippians 4:8)

(3) Calm down and start building thoughtful behaviors back into your relationship.
List some of the things you know would make your spouse happy. Be specific. For example, hugging your husband when he comes home from work after a hard day, or helping your wife with the laundry. Show you care! Inject consideration back into your relationship.

(4) React by viewing your partner through God's eyes.
Trying to love others like God loves you is a good rule for all your relationships, not just marriage. And if you don't love yourself, start by remembering what God says about you: that you're blessed… loved… valued… and wonderfully made.

May... God... give you a spirit of unity.
Romans 15:5


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 3:58 PM   2 comments
Saturday, February 24, 2007
Keyword Kaos: "Smell Check"
Surprisingly, my keyword searches over this past week were quite tame. Nobody is searching to see if Hawaiian Punch has been tainted with swine fluids and all is quiet concerning ancient Egyptian Kings who may have smoked Marijuana.

Out there somewhere is a wife who is concerned after catching her husband sniffing her panties, but that isn't much of a big deal.

I sniff laundry all of the time because I have a husband and daughter who ransack through their closets and drawers trying to find out what they want to wear each morning. Leaving a pile of unfolded, rumpled clean clothing on the floor. Since soiled clothing never seems to make it's way to the hamper and I refuse to rewash clothing that is clean, the sniff test is an appropriate time saving technique for a Wife or Mother. Perhaps even a modern Husband or Father that is burdened with dreaded laundry duties.

There were an extraordinary number of searches this week for those who are having issues with their mother.

- how to run away from your mom
- what to do if you are 9 & your mom wants you to watch cinderella 3
- when your mother didn't love you
- mother doesn't love me
- what you gonna do when your mom hates you
- what to do if your mom hates you
- what do you do when your all grown up and you know your mom doesnt love you
- what do you do when your teenager refuses to come home
- how to drive moms crazy
- mother squeezing my pimple

This makes me feel sad and honestly, having relationship issues with your Mother is something that I cannot understand. I only know what it is like to be a daughter who has serious relationship issues with her Dad.

My Mother was and still is extraordinary as she displayed huge amounts of love, patience and understanding. She deserves so much praise and credit for who I am and perhaps even the fact that I am even alive today.

Unlike Dad, Mom rarely spanked me and when she did there was no reason to be angry at her afterward. I full on deserved it by breaking not only a rule of the household, but a rule that caused her to worry herself sick about me. I could also trust her and bring any problem to her knowing she wouldn't go running to Dad over every little thing, especially those personal things.

Mom wasn't totally perfect, there were many things that she was a bit "spacey" about and many other matters that she hadn't a clue over. She was very prudish and old fashioned which caused us to disagree on how I was dressed and who I was dating many times. However, looking back now, even with her little imperfections she still is the model Mom that I've been hoping to measure up to.

So for those who are finding my blog after Googling questions about strained relationships with their Moms, I'm sorry and wish you the best. My only advice would simply be to pray for your Mothers. It can't hurt for sometimes there are things that only Mom and God know about and need to fix and work out together. Could be anything from a bad past, addictions, heartaches or fears that adults need to come to terms with. It isn't always a child's place to make them face these issues - but a good sincere prayer will help your spirit and the spirit shared between your Mother and you.


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 1:34 PM   8 comments
Friday, February 23, 2007
Nancy Grace "Objection!"
Nancy Grace "host of her own show on CNN, a legal commentator on Court TV and a former prosecutor who never loss a case" is coming to Savannah to show her ass tomorrow morning for a presentation and book signing to benefit the Backus Children's Hospital.

I'm having objections and issues with the Queen of Mean even stepping foot into our beautiful city that is known for it's polite and charming hospitality.

A city that she had referred to as being as dangerous as Baghdad!

It is obviously a sad attempt at a sorry public relations ploy to soften the Queen of Mean up after she directly harassed a guest on her show to the point of suicide. If I remember correctly, talk show host Jenny Jones indirectly created similar victims after exploiting their dysfunction and circumstances and she is no longer on the air.

In her book, "Objection!" she claims to be an "outspoken critic of the media circus that often surrounds high-profile cases."

Oh really? Well let's take a look at some cold hard facts here Ms. Nancy Grace. Your very own CNN website today for instance. Tonight's show is about Anna Nicole, Saturday's show is about Anna Nicole, Sunday's show is about Britney Spears and wouldn't you know it Monday's show is about Anna Nicole. Nancy Grace even has a voter poll up asking whether or not we're satisfied with the judge's ruling on the Anna Nicole case.

Excuse me Ms. Nancy Grace, tell me more about this media circus again? Funny thing about Circuses, they used to have politically incorrect side shows that featured and exploited freaks.

"Ladies and Gentlemen of Savannah... boys and girls... step right up and see the bitterest woman in the world present a lecture on justice. Tickets just $50!"

It gets even freakier folks, the book "Objection!" that Nancy Grace will be signing at this event was reported by the New York Daily News in September of 2006 of containing 359 plagiarisms. Her defense? This was a "inadvertent error" that she intends on correcting in future publications.

Savannah, we are a beautiful city with honorable people despite our differences. Our city, our victims and our problems need not be exploited by the likes of this horrendous woman.

Backus Children's Hospital is a wonderful foundation and deserves our support. You have many opportunities to do so by giving financially, giving blood or becoming a Volunteer.

Circuses are the sort of events that once you've seen one you've seen 'em all. Nancy Grace obviously has nothing new, nice or original to bring to Savannah's Civic Center tomorrow. Other than to shoot her mouth when many of us would rather see her shoot out of a cannon clear to Carolina.


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 5:47 PM   5 comments
Wednesday, February 21, 2007
Do You Have Issues?
A whole week has went by without a single issue sent in and I take that as a good sign. This must mean everyone out there in the Blogosphere must be at peace and content for the time being.

Almost a year ago I started this blog for all the wrong reasons. After belonging for years in a long-standing Forum Group some weird, tacky, wacky and hacky things started happening to all of the members after a flame war went down. As owner of the group I tried to solve it and find out who was playing the childish head games. Thus the blog title, "Do you have Issues?" It was a sad attempt to solve a very pitiful situation.

After things cooled down it seemed Google had picked up this blog and I was getting a bunch of "Dear Abby" type emails and comments from people having issues from all over the world. At first I tried to shake it, but then realized that everyone has issues from time to time and kept the title. I've changed a few things and added a few others and the blog just grew and evolved to where it's at today.

Looking back through some of my archives this morning I realized that left unmentioned are many of my own issues over this past year. In particular the serious ones such as my Mom's battle against Breast Cancer and my own scare a few months back. Financial problems, car troubles, house repairs, work, family and relationship issues. In my "Margie Unplugged" segments I let a little of me out, but I tend to keep the bigger things tucked away safely, secretly and privately.

There's a part of me this morning that says this is misleading and I should spill some more, even if only to inspire, encourage and help another go through a similar issue.

Then there is that other part of me with a big huge zit at the end of my nose, that is already sore from the onset of spring allergies so I sneeze. In doing so I fart so loudly that the dog runs out from underneath my chair in fear for his life and knocks over anything in his path. The phone rings and the answering machine picks it up, my Mom is calling just as my daughter who is riding her new bike in the house slams it into the 30 gallon fish tank. The light drops in and without thinking I reach in to fish it out and end up flying 15 feet backwards because I didn't unplug the stupid thing first.

My life isn't full of issues. No. It's full of chaos, crazy and totally unbelievable happenings. Y'all wouldn't even believe me if I told you. So I beg of you - write in and give me some issues. I crave some normalcy!

(Do you have issues? If so write in and vent here! All personal information is kept confidential and questions may be edited to exclude identifiable information. )


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 11:43 AM   9 comments
Tuesday, February 20, 2007
Tinfoil Chef: "Swedish Meatballs"
Welcome again to "Tinfoil Chef " where I'd like to feature healthy recipes for square meals on meager pockets.

Spaghetti and Meatballs is always a cheap favorite for many families, but sometimes I get a little tired of sauce and have a hankering for something different. This recipe does the trick!

-1 14oz can beef gravy
-1/4 can water
-1/4 cup sour cream
-1 Tbs Worcestershire sauce
-1/2 tsp salt
-1/4 tsp pepper
-1 6.5oz can sliced mushrooms
-1 lb frozen fully cooked meatballs
-1 (8-ounce) package wide egg noodles

Set your Crockpot on low and toss in can of beef gravy, 1/4 can of water, 1/4 cup of sour cream, 1 TBS Worcestershire sauce, 1/2 tsp salt and 1/4 tsp pepper. Stir well until fully blended.

Next drain the can of sliced mushrooms and toss them in with 1 lb of frozen fully cooked meatballs. Put lid on Crockpot and go away for 3-4 hours.

Right before supper, boil the wide egg noodles on the stove top according to directions and drain. Serve meatballs on each plate over a bed of egg noodles and top off with your choice of a veggie side. Serves: 5-6

Total Cost: $5.06 approximately .83 cents a person.
Prep Time: 5 minutes and 15 minutes for final dinner prep.


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 4:39 PM   9 comments
Monday, February 19, 2007
Look Familiar?
Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 9:20 PM   7 comments
Sunday, February 18, 2007
Fast Food From The God Box: "Talents"
There was a lesson I learned very young in Sunday School. The teacher gave us all $3 one morning for at the end of the month there was going to be a fair and flea market to help raise money for our summer camp fees. Each child was asked to make something to sell on our class table at the fair.

One girl made cupcakes and sold them for .25 cents a piece ending up turning her $3 into $12. Another boy made a dozen birdhouses and sold them for $5 and turned his $3 into $60. We even had a kid march to the corner store to buy lots of candy and he ate it all before the month was through, making nothing.

The teachers initial investment of about $30 (10 kids) multiplied tenfold due to her belief in us and our efforts. The lesson of the Talents (Matt 25: 15-30) combined with her investment has turned into millions by now. Even the kid who spent all his money on Jolly Ranchers is now the owner of a chain of Pizzerias.

The definition of Talents extends further than the means of money or gold. The classic, "Legend of Bagger Vance" has an interesting quote:

"Inside each and every one of us is our one, true authentic swing. Something we was born with. Something that's ours and ours alone. Something that can't be learned... something that's got to be remembered."

Maybe your talent isn't swinging a golf club, baking cupcakes or hand tossing pizza pies. Perhaps it is as simple as a natural ability towards human kindness and compassion. Wishing someone a good day or helping someone put their shopping buggy to the parking lot corral. Acts of kindness or a simple smile can multiply to many when practiced. Remember to invest in your talents today.


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 11:03 AM   7 comments
Saturday, February 17, 2007
Keyword Kaos: "Huffing"
We interrupt the usual Keyword Kaos to report on the astounding number of "Get Myself Dead Issues" that poured through my Statcounter this past week.

18 - How to get High off of Lysol
3 - How to get high off of Axe Deodorant Spray

For those of you just stopping by or for those of you who do not know about stat reporting, these are the search words or terms that others had typed into Google, Yahoo or MSN search engines that had directed them to your site or weblog. I'm loosing sleep because it's painfully obvious that peeps be out there wanting to Huff shit!

To these people, KNOW this ain't your typical "Mommy" speaking. I know the deal, you're sitting with friends or alone and desiring to get a buzz on. You'll get busted if you hit up Dad's Liquor cabinet anymore for he's been drawing the levels on the bottles with a Sharpie Pen. Then some fool friend asks you what sort of cleaning supplies does your Momma have in the cabinet under the sink. Talking some shit about how aerosol products and others can offer up a sweet buzz.

Well, I'm here to tell you that your fool friend is one stupid cheap bastard! What's he gonna suggest next? That he rolls up a Food Stamp and sniffs up lines of Comet Cleanser? Well if you want to eventually be shot up and mainlined with some embalming fluid this is the way to go about it.

I ain't shitting you either. Many Mommy's and Housekeepers have been found cold and stiff after using various cleaning products in unventilated places. Quickly, and there was NO BUZZ for if there was, they would have known something was wrong by first feeling dizzy and would have escaped for some fresh air. Instead they felt overwhelmingly dizzy, nauseated and dropped dead on the spot.

Think for a second, cleaning products are designed to kill germs, odor causing bacteria, bugs, mildew and mold. Your body is nothing but a sack of living cells and biological goo. Each living cell working, splitting, multiplying and doing it's intended job. When you huff, the chemicals get into your blood stream and start killing off cells. The high or buzz that you feel is not because there is an added chemical in your system like Alcohol or Marijuana - it is because your body is freaking out. Your organs are banging on the pipes saying, "Send us the oxygen carrying red blood cells!! We're Dying here!"

Trust me, this ain't the way you wanna go. Do you want to be remembered as the cheap, stupid kid who killed himself with a can of Scrubbing Bubbles? Yes, I'm a Mom and you know what - I would rather have a kid who angers and embarrasses the shit out me by getting expelled from school or busted and in jail for underage drinking. I'd rather have you handcuffed and in Juvenile Detention for a bag of weed. I'd rather these far more than having to plan your funeral and bury your cold stiff stupid ass six foot under.

Well, I'm done my rant. Kids, just stay out of all cabinets will you? Unless you like them so much you want to spend forever in a nice pine, wooden coffin of a cabinet. If you want a cheap buzz then just sit down that XBox paddle and run your asses around the block as long and as fast as you can. You'll experience the best euphoria in a healthy natural adrenaline buzz that will last longer than huffing without the puking and pounding headaches.

Keyword Kaos will return in it's usual format next Saturday as I'll leave you with two more disturbing search terms of the week:

- I caught my daughters boyfriend sniffing my panties
- Hawaiian punch has pig sperm

(Click to enlarge)


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 10:57 AM   6 comments
Friday, February 16, 2007
Margie Unplugged - Thank God it's Friday
Behind the scenes here it has been one heck of a busy week! I'm in the mood for a little moshing, head-banging and heavy metal this evening. If you are too, then play away. (Dr. John; you may want to pass on this one, Sir.)

I'll do 'ya all a favor and totally leave out my hectic events this week. I had a very nice Valentine's Day and evening. Gon didn't buy me flowers but instead hooked Squirt up with a half a dozen. Instead of chocolate he brought us a bottle of Champagne. A bottle that we are sipping on right now at this very moment. So if I sound a little out of sorts and tipsy - I most likely am.

My favorite gift of all was a hand held Solitaire Game. See, I have this sick ritual whenever I go to the bathroom. I've graduated from reading material to playing hand held games such as Yahtzee and Poker. Both games have taken quite a beating from their everyday use and now I have a new one to raise a stink over.

Today was uneventful, really. For those who don't know I take care of an elderly couple here in Savannah. The Mister had to go away for two days for surgery. He's home now with a big boo-boo on his forehead and a big boo-boo on his shoulder. Doing well and feeling quite chipper despite all he has been through.

I was able to call it a day early and came home to relax for a few. That was until Squirt decided we needed to go to the store to buy a "Spongebob's House." A few weeks ago I explained to her that we can buy pineapples at the store and I think she was expecting some giant hollow house of a thing she could climb into and play in. The only pineapple she has had were those right out of the can. Tonight, she's tickled pink and quite intrigued with this prickly fruit. I haven't the nerve to chop it up just yet.

Well, I'm just going to quit posting and get down and around visiting blogs this evening. Quitting now before the champagne gets me to sounding a little too silly and giddy. For now, lifting my glass in honor of "St. Practice Day".

"Here's to a great weekend for everyone!"


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 9:30 PM   2 comments
Thursday, February 15, 2007
Wikiality or Truthiness?
Last week's answer: Wikiality. It seems the popular consensus is that when a creditor sends back a payment (partial or in full) they are refusing your money, thus releasing you from your debt. However according to the laws of the Uniform Commercial Code this tricky consensus is not factual. Returning your payment is simply them refusing to honor "your" terms of the debt.

However, there is a bit of Truthiness to the story depending on the laws in your state. I wouldn't try partial payments or messing with the accounting departments of those who hold your mortgage or car loan for fear of repossession or foreclosure.

Utilities also, for they can be shut off if payment arrangements aren't agreed upon. But for most other debts, if you're in a financial pickle small payments can be held in your favor vs. no payment at all. You've shown an sincere and responsible effort.


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 8:18 AM   4 comments
Wednesday, February 14, 2007
Turning up the Heat on Valentine's Day
Margie: My hubby asked me what I wanted for Valentine's Day and I asked him to pick me out something sexy to wear like a nightie or lingerie. He said he wouldn't and I thought it was because he was too embarrassed to go and buy something like this but instead he said that I wasn't hot enough to wear sexy things anymore. I am only 34 and in good shape but I am so upset with him that I can't even look at him anymore. Should I go buy myself something for Valentines Day and remind him how hot I can be? - Cold in Florida

Funny, I was listening to my favorite morning radio show "Lex and Terry" this morning on my way to work. A lady called in to ask something to the tune of "at what age is a woman no longer hot." There are a few men on the show - each with different perspectives but they all seemed to agree that there is a short window of "hot" in a woman's life. Terry explained it well by saying, "Hot is an age when you don't try to be hot. After that a woman can be considered beautiful but not hot."

I gotta defend him, he didn't mean to sound like such a creep - but he was right. To often us ladies try to chase down that "hot" look and we end up miserable doing so. Exercising to the point of exhaustion, never ending dieting, primping, plucking and lifting things at the high expense of time and money. We're trying too hard when to be simply beautiful need not take so much effort.

So no, under NO circumstances should you march over to Victoria Secret and buy that sexy cat-suit or flimsy see-through negligee. First of all it is February and even though you are in Florida there is a bit of a chill in the air. Next, the material that they use for this sort of attire is adorned with scratchy, itchy lace, garters, straps and Lord knows what flimsy elastic that may snap off and take someone's eye out.

Save your money and instead go and buy your husband a brand new white dress shirt or T-shirt. When the sun goes down and you're ready to get comfortable, simply just wear this shirt. Pop some popcorn and rent a cool action DVD full of fast cars and lots of shoot 'em up scenes. Curl up on the sofa beside him, munch down all of the chocolates he gave you and I guarantee you'll have a hot yet beautiful romantic night.

(Do you have issues? If so write in and vent here! All personal information is kept confidential and questions may be edited to exclude identifiable information. )


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 9:49 AM   7 comments
Tuesday, February 13, 2007
Tinfoil Chef: "Monster Pot Pie"
Welcome to "Tinfoil Chef " where I'd like to feature healthy recipes for square meals on meager pockets. The following is a cheap and easy meal that can be altered to your taste or dietary needs.

-2 cans of Campbell's Chunky Stew or Gumbo.
-2 frozen 8" pie shells
-Spritz of cooking spray.

Preheat oven to 350. Place one frozen pie shell on top of cookie sheet. Pour the two cans of Campbell's Chunky in to the pie shell.

Carefully remove the remaining pie shell out of the aluminum pan and place on top. Sealing sides with fork. Spritz a bit of flavored cooking spray. (I use Pam Butter flavored) on top to encourage browning. Bake for 45 minutes. Serves 6.

Total Cost: $4.57 approximately .76 cents per person.
Prep Time: 5 minutes

Visit the Campbell's site for some interesting flavors and possibilities. We love the Healthy Request "Grilled Chicken & Sausage Gumbo" but have also enjoyed "Steak & Potato", "Roasted Beef with Mushrooms", "Chicken Broccoli Cheese & Potato" and "Baked Potato with Cheddar & Bacon."

Finding these pot pies not only easy to make, but more flavorful and full of more veggies and ingredients than the typical frozen pot pies offer. Top the night off with a side salad and dinner is a breeze!


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 2:27 PM   4 comments
Monday, February 12, 2007
See-Saw at the Office Park
Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 7:05 PM   5 comments
Sunday, February 11, 2007
Fast Food From the God Box: "Laodicean Era"
In Daniel 12:4 it reads, "…even to the time of the end: many shall run to and fro, and knowledge shall be increased.”

Because of the internet, mass transportation and other technological advancements we can travel "to and fro" across the globe and our knowledge is greatly expanding. With this ever increasing knowledge comes also increased opinion and many types of character.

For the first time ever in history, many of the world's religions actually agree on one thing. That being that we are now living in the last and final era. Even those with no religion at all seem to agree that either conflict, disaster and change is right around the corner through events like global warming and nuclear war. What follows is change - described in many ways such as Paradise, Heaven, Transformation, Spiritual Awakening, Immortality, Peace and for some the extinction of all mankind.

Similar to other doctrines, the Bible describes this climate as the Laodicean Era. The name means, "the people rule, judge and decide." In such a climate, politicians cater to the whim of the people’s demands by sitting on fences and not making stands. CEOs must keep their shareholders happy. It's an age when the people have a voice and an opinion.

Thus here we are Blogging! As soon as a Blogger clicks "Publish" their thoughts go out for all to see and enables the individual to have a voice that is heard and most importantly, it counts.

If it counts, then eventually something is added up. What does your Blog add up to?


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 2:24 PM   7 comments
Saturday, February 10, 2007
Keyword Kaos: "Do You have a Willy?"
1. Recipe issues.
-what do you put on onion bagels
-shit on shingle appetizer
-flan canned milk boiled in the can
-do mushrooms go in crockpot chili

2. Political issues.
-reasons not to vote for hilary
-why vote for john mccain?
-savannah georgia jury duty

3. Entertainment/Travel Issues.
-mafia party invitation
-what time can visit the statue of liberty and what time have to go home
-bozo show savannah
-rind county georgia
-upcoming singing contest in georgia

4. Vanity issues.
-im addicted to squeezing pimples
-my feet are small prayer
-metaformin and weight loss
-why do i get symmetrical pimples?
-addicted to squeezing blackheads
-mushroom hairstyle
-average poots per day

5. Mechanical and Consumer Issues.
-how to get high off of lysol
-dishwasher elbow screw facing wrong way
-kmart clearance schedule
-do you have a willy

(Click to enlarge.)


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 11:25 AM   5 comments
Friday, February 09, 2007
Margie Unplugged - Organizing Hats
I've been trying to simplify my blog by narrowing down to daily topics verses a hodge-podge of brain farts. Nothing is set in stone just yet as I'm trying to find out what works and what doesn't.

Fridays are going to be casual. Just me, free-writing and hanging out - journaling a "Margie Unplugged." Just another day to open up and share who I am, where I'm at and where I wanna be.

For starters, I'm going to play tag! Lavender stopped by yesterday and tapped me on the comment shoulder with "Things you may not have known about me."

1.Four jobs I have had in my life: Having had more than four jobs, I'll sneak in those in between gigs that I had to get by on: Telemarketer for Replacement Windows - one of the worst jobs ever because almost everyone that you call hangs up on you. Certainteed Fiberglass Factory - rolling around and stacking the most itchiest product known to mankind. Waitressing overnight at Denny's and a Clerk at an Auction House.

2. Four Movies I have watched over and over: The Lord of the Rings Trilogy, Forrest Gump, Titanic and Saving Private Ryan.

3. Four places I have lived: Collings Lakes, NJ, Chester, PA, Newtonville, NJ and Savannah, GA.

4. Four TV shows I love to watch: Jon Stewart's Daily Show, The Colbert Report, LOST and The Mythbusters.

5. Four places I have been on vacation: Boston, MA, Orlando, FL, Lancaster County, PA and Savannah, GA. (Funny that I ended up moving here! I still feel like I'm on vacation.)

6. Four of my favorite foods: Coconut, Flan, pizza and fried bologna sammiches.

7. Four places I would rather be right now: In bed sleeping, Snowmobiling up North, on a trip through time 20 years in our future or at the Georgia Lottery Office picking up a four foot check.

I'm supposed to list four people that will respond - or tag four people, I'm not sure. Since I'm a really, shy and timid person outside of the Blogosphere - I'll leave this last one up to fate.

Back to simplifying things and organizing my time, this was in part a New Year's Resolution. Wearing so many hats can be overwhelming and I soon found myself forgetting important things or not setting aside time for others.

I'm now a month in and starting to see the results of having a bit more order in things. Keeping a private diary and calendar to schedule tasks, appointments and bubble baths has really helped. It may sound strange, but I've found that often it isn't enough just to say you'll do something - I have to write it down.

Overall, I'm thrilled that it is Friday and that I can hang up a few of my responsibility hats by the time the sun goes down this evening. First thing on my agenda is to order Pizza and break out the paper plates!


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 3:23 PM   8 comments
Thursday, February 08, 2007
Wikiality or Truthiness? - Paying Bills
You're swimming in debt and trying to write out checks for all of your bills at the beginning of the month. Unfortunately, you don't have enough money in your checking account to cover them all. You are then left with the harsh decision on whether to not pay someone at all or send out a partial payment.

Lots of creditors are very cooperative when you call them to explain your situation. They are more than happy to take a partial payment and make arrangements to allow you to catch up. Yet, there are some who don't. They'll ream you out, raising your blood pressure and worry level to heights unbearable, outright refusing to accept a partial payment. What do you do?

Send them a partial payment anyway!! They have to take it - if they don't and send your check back to you - they are legally releasing you from your entire debt. No kidding! In the eyes of the law they are refusing payment and saying, "We don't want your money!"

The only law applicable is if you wrote "Payment in Full" in the memo area when you still owe a balance. They can still sign and cash the check, providing they write "under protest" beside it. They can also send the check back not endorsed with a letter stating they refuse to accept your Payment in Full terms.

Basically, a creditor refusing a check for partial payment when you still fully admit there is a balance due - legally releases you from the entire debt. You can't loose!

So be creative when forced to juggle your bills around. If a creditor really burns your buttons and sets your jugular pounding with rage try sending your next payment like this:

Then DARE them to send it back!!

You decide - Wikiality or Truthiness?


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 7:35 AM   9 comments
Wednesday, February 07, 2007
Wikiality or Truthiness?

In a little town called Pigeon Falls the townspeople often get together for coffee and saffron buns, hosting what is known there as "The Liar's Club." Each take turns telling a story, either from recent news events, history or a personal experience. The purpose is to find out who - in this tiny town - is the best storyteller on the block.

My very favorite news reporter, Stephen Colbert has sniffed out, identified and defined a new sense of biased, opinionated news media, rhetoric and spin into two separate satirical terms: Truthiness and Wikiality.

Truthiness: Truth that comes from the gut, not books. The quality of preferring concepts one wishes to be true, rather than concepts or facts known to be true.

Wikiality: Reality as defined by a consensus, particularly in a collaborative endeavor such as Wikipedia

Starting tomorrow, each Thursday I'm want to try something new by posting a short story that may be true or pure bologna. It is up to you the reader to dismantle it in my comment section by declaring if it is "Wikiality or Truthiness?" I'll post the answer in next weeks post so that everyone has had a chance to play and comment.

If you want to play along and share a big fish story of your own, let me know! I'll love to stop by and read your stories. If you happen across a news story that reads too incredible to be true, I'd love to read that also. I'll slap a Mr. Linky at the end of tomorrow's premier post for those who want to join in the fun.


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 12:52 PM   6 comments
If your Mother doesn't love you... who will?
Dear Margaret: My Mom hates me. She loves me because I am her kid and all and if I died she would probably cry but she doesn't understand me. Whenever I do go to her with a problem she tells me that I am over reacting and that my emotions are all just bullshit. I feel like I should run away or kill myself. If your Mother doesn't love you... who will? -Cynthia in MN

Listen Kiddo, you're Momma doesn't hate you. She may hate the things you do or the fact there are things you do not do or forget to do. She may even hate to see you upset over a problem or the fact you are going through a dramatic ordeal; but I sincerely doubt that she hates you.

I remember driving my Mom bonkers when I was a teen and you know what, it's not that she didn't understand me - it was the fact that I didn't understand myself or what I was going through. I didn't know for sure that certain things would blow over or end up alright in the long run. I never was a teenager before, that was my first run in with certain situations and trust me, they were some really screwed up situations.

Looking back now, Mom was mostly right. She was a teenager before and now I dread the day when I have to go through the same fighting and arguing with my own daughter. It isn't easy being a teenager and it isn't easy being the parent of a teenager either.

Now, you didn't say your Mom was insane or anything so I'm hoping she's not going to kill you or beat you senseless. Either way, it seems that at this time in your life you are at odds with her more often than not. That being the case, go adopt a Mom. Find a mature adult that you can come to or call with issues. Just in case. Maybe a favorite Aunt, Grandmother, your Father, older sister or a Mother of a friend who seems to have her head on straight.

Even grown-ups when they are diagnosed with an illness or injury, seek out second opinions. We even find times when we need to seek out lawyers to represent us when we land ourselves in stinks. So just in case you do land yourself in a stink and feel you can't go to your Mom first - have someone on hand to go to. Someone who will maturely help guide you or help you come to your Mom with a serious issue.

As for wanting to run away or kill yourself, please go speak with a school nurse or counselor. That is what they are there for and you can trust them. If they think you are in danger they will help save you. They'll help you cope with issues, big or small. They are pretty cool too, and won't call your Mom and tell her stuff behind your back. If you need help they can help you. Defend you if you have to face your Mother with a situation and you don't want to go it alone.

Hang in there. Going off to college or off on your own, isn't too far off. You'll have a whole entire, exciting world before you soon and if all goes well, a wonderful Mom who you will love to come home to. Make sure to bring lots of laundry! Sure, she'll bitch a fit but you know what? There is a part inside of all Moms that love to be there whenever their grown up children need them. -Margie

(Do you have issues? If so write in and vent here! All personal information is kept confidential and questions may be edited to exclude identifiable information. All subject matter accepted from product issues, personal issues, work issues and even issues with this here web log!)


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 10:38 AM   7 comments
Tuesday, February 06, 2007
Tinfoil Chef: Stuffed Ricotta Shells w/Shrimp Sauce
Here is an interesting twist on an old Italian favorite!

12 oz. Jumbo Shells
-16 oz. Ricotta Cheese
-16 oz. Frozen cocktail shrimp (Peeled/cooked about 100 pieces)
-2 Cans (10 3/4 oz) Campbells Shrimp Soup
-2 Eggs
-1 Cup Milk
-4 oz. Chopped Pimento
-1 Cup Shredded Cheese (Motzi, Cheddar - your choice)
-2 Cloves Garlic
-2 tsp. Parsley
-2 tsp. Butter or margarine
-2 Tsp. Old Bay (seafood seasoning)

- Bring 4 quarts of water to rolling boil and add Jumbo Shells. Cook Al Dente' as the shells will continue to cook in oven. Drain and rinse with cool water.

- Mix in medium bowl eggs, ricotta cheese, 2 oz. chopped pimento, 1 clove chopped garlic, 1 tsp. parsley, 1 Tsp "Old Bay" and 3/4 c of cheese. (Set 1/4 cup cheese aside)

- In another bowl mix together Cans of Shrimp Soup, milk, 2 oz. chopped pimento, 1 clove chopped garlic, 1 tsp. parsley, 1tsp "Old Bay" and fold in 16 oz of frozen peeled/cooked frozen cocktail shrimp.

- In the bottom of 13 x 9" Lasagna pan smear a little of the soup mixture and add 2 tsp. butter. Fill shells with 1 heaping Tbls of Ricotta mixture and arrange along bottom of pan evenly. (Stuffed side up) Pour Shrimp & Shrimp Soup mixture ontop of shells. Sprinkle with remaining cheese, spritz with Parsley and cover with foil.

- Bake in 350 oven for about 40-45 minutes when bubbly. (Crockpot Low 3 hrs - High 1.5 hrs) Serve with tossed salad or veggie of choice.

Serves: 8-12 total

(NOTE: Most items economically bought in market by size - shells, shrimp, ricotta. I halfed the batch in an oval 4qt crockpot and put the remaining half in 2qt Casserole dish in freezer so that I may thaw, heat up in oven and serve another time. Recipe can be halved if you're able to find smaller packaging. Also the Ricotta, milk and cheese can be substituted with lo-fat and other dietary options )


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 8:25 AM   4 comments
Monday, February 05, 2007
Why Vote for Barack Obama
Political news this past week has been funnier than watching Comedy Central's South Park. In case you haven't been up to date, President George W. Bush threw himself a Cartman fit - saying more or less, "Respect my Authori-tay!" when he declared himself the sole decision maker last week. John McCain has become Professor Chaos and Ms. Garrison, or rather; Hillary Clinton had slaughtered our National Anthem like a bad American Idol audition, So without further adieu...

Vote for Barack Obama because he is articulate and bright and clean!

Now these aren't my words, but the words of another Presidential hopeful; Senator Joe Biden of Delaware who spent a long-winded 12 minutes apologizing for this politically incorrect remark. It seems a well groomed, highly educated, honest black man who speaks the King's English is standing out like a sore thumb making the other Presidential hopefuls a little concerned that they will go unnoticed.

President Bush was quick to defend his fellow short-bus friends this Saturday when he attended the Democratic Conventional Retreat. "Now look, my diction isn't all that good, I have been accused of occasionally mangling the English language. And so I appreciate you inviting the head of the Republic Party."

No offense, Mr. Bush but you seemed to have left out the "can" in Republican Party. We're sorely in need of a decision maker who can be democratic. Making good ole' Obama here a welcomed breath of fresh air.

(Last week: Why vote for John McCain)


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 9:35 AM   11 comments
Sunday, February 04, 2007
Fast Food From the God Box: "Entertaining Angels"
Our Curbie-Can from Waste Management has a warning on it's lid, "Do NOT Roll With the Lid Open." While cleaning out our cars yesterday I felt this warning didn't apply to me and attempted to wheel the can over to my husband's car without first putting the lid up.

I ended up tripping on the hanging lid flap and ended up head first in the Garbage Can with my feet straight up in the air. The worse part wasn't over - for then I had to thrash myself back and forth trying to rock the can over on it's side so I could get out.

Thank heavens nobody saw what had happened. There is no embarrassing YouTube of the incident spreading over the internet like wildfire to ruin my future employment prospects. I'll never suffer the humility of being asked, "Hey, aren't you the girl who got owned by that trash can?"

However, according to my faith there must be a few Angels who have hurting sides this morning after laughing so hard yesterday. I'm sure that even God himself gave a chuckle or two. Jesus is often acquainted with being the Man of Many Sorrows but do we really know the Author of all Joy?

The ending of Ernest Lawrence Thayer's famous rhyme, "Casey at the Bat" describes the situation well:

"Oh, somewhere in the this favored land
the sun is shining bright;
The band is playing somewhere
and somewhere hearts are light;
And somewhere men are laughing;
and somewhere children shout,
But there is no joy in Mudville --
Mighty Casey has struck out."

Many people today are stuck in Mudville thinking that if only Casey slammed the ball out of the park, there would be laughter and rejoicing. If they could win the lotto or if they could land that next great job - then Mudville will become Joyville. Attaching all of their dreams and hopes on earthly events.

As a Christian I am joyful. Not because I am blind to injustice and suffering, but because I am convinced that these things are not ultimate. There has been many times in my life when I was sad, confused and angry but I have learned not to worry. The purpose of God is to bring all things in heaven and earth together into peace with great rejoicing.

Not to throw us all head first into trashcans.


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 12:58 PM   6 comments
Saturday, February 03, 2007
How to drive a Mom crazy!
You may think all of these singing, dancing stuffed animals are so adorable. You may even think you know of a child who would absolutely love to have one of these demon possessed singing critters. It is true, children do love them... LOTS!

So much so - they like to gather them all up and set them all off at the same time.

Price of singing toy: $12.99
Hours of Double A Battery life: An ETERNITY!
Packets of Goody's Headache Powder: Not NEARLY enough.

(Shameless Hint)
An afternoon for Mommy to be pampered at a SPA: Priceless!
Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 10:38 AM   7 comments
Keyword Kaos: "Maxi Pad Slippers"
Webblog Stats continue to amaze me. They speak volumes on interesting subject material and what internet users are searching for. Some keyword subject material I would love to steer my blog away from - yet there are many that are good for a giggle or two. So without delay here are the ABC's on the "Issues" of others this past week:

addicted to squeezing zits
- Break the habit by investing in a few rolls of bubble wrap.

anal fissures
- NO! I ain't gonna go there.

dominant wife blog
- This term has been quite popular and I don't have a clue about dominant anything.

fast food god
- Ronald McDonald? Burger King? Colonel Sanders?

house slippers made out of maxi pads
- How crafty!

paternity results from chimp retirement
- Chimp Teresa became pregnant after using a public restroom.

people with fairy blood
- Sorry, this is a family secret that must not ever be disclosed.

redneck cake molds
- Cupcakes made in empty PBR cans?

rowan atkinson psychological problem
- No! Don't tell me Mr. Bean has gone insane!

subliminal phallic ad m&m's
- This had to be Jerry Farwell. First the Gay Purple Teletubby, then a gay Spongebob and now he has to go and ruin the fun by picking on chocolate. Doesn't this guy have anything better to preach about?

the perfect guy sermon
- That Teletubbies, Spongebob and M&M's are evil homosexual characters with penises?

visit doctor to have sticks removed
- Umm... where exactly did you stick those chopsticks?

want out of marriage grown apart
- File for divorce would be my first guess.

what do you call it when you have a pimple on each cheek
- Symmetrical Skin condition? Maybe you have fairy blood?

why vote for hillary
- Because she scares the shit out of people.

wonder pets flyboat template
- Sounds like a cool template. I'll make you one. =O)

(Click to Enlarge)
Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 10:20 AM   3 comments
Friday, February 02, 2007
Groundhog's Day Gone Awry
I filled my new prescription for "Ambien CR" yesterday afternoon. It's not that I have problems getting to sleep, only staying asleep and getting a good sound rest through the night.

So last night about 9:30, I lifted up a glass of OJ and toasted to a good night sleep.

"Through the lips and on the tongue. Watch out Neurotransmitters, Ambien CR is on the run!"

About a 1/2 hour later, I sat here in front of my computer wide awake and tripping. The only way I can describe it would be that your brain suddenly looses it's "Picture in Picture" ability. Usually I can sit here blogging, listening and singing to tunes and at the same time have a cake in the oven, play Candyland with a four year old, hear and answer a question my husband just asked me.

The Queen of Multi-tasking had been trumped, by a teeny white pill called Ambien.

As the font in my browser started to sway, dance and jump off the webpage at me - I finally decided that it was time to go to bed. My brain had become useless to me and my reality was altered. I was dreaming yet still not in bed sleeping. That was until I found myself back in time 25 years ago and in my childhood bedroom.

"Margie! Wake up, it's time to get ready for school!" Mom called as I rolled over pulling the covers over my head so to not hear her and go back to sleep.

Then the chanting started. "Margie! Margie! Margie! Margie!" It was coming from outside of my bedroom window and wouldn't stop. It wouldn't let me go back to sleep and was really starting to piss me off.

So I got up out of bed. Frumpy and grumpy with lots of attitude as I dragged myself to my front door. Whatever or whoever was out there not letting me sleep was about to be doused with my garden hose and hit with an old shoe.

As I swung open the front door some guy dressed as Ebeneezer Scrooge grabbed me by the neck and shouted, "She doesn't see her shadow! Spring will be early this year!"

The crowd of people cheered. Camera's flashed and helicopters circled overhead as I hung there pissed off, half asleep and stark naked with my teeth falling out in front of my entire HS Senior class.

It was around then when my alarm clock went off and I sat straight up in bed, relieved to have returned to reality. This morning, I cannot begin to tell you if I feel fully rested or just plain scared to death to go back to sleep again.


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 10:18 AM   11 comments

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