Wednesday, June 28, 2006
Going Postal on the Mail Carrier
13 Complaints that I wish to say to our half-baked USPS mail carrier:

1. We rent DVDs online through Blockbuster and I am fairly certain that our mail carrier is watching them before she delivers them. Particularly the ones in a good season like LOST or 24. While we sit here in agonizing anxiety wondering what happens next - she is off watching our vids!

2. For the love of God PLEASE stop stuffing my parcels in my mail cubby. If they barely fit through the post carriers back end - they sure as hell won't be able to come out our end. Not without tearing the book or box to shreds while trying to do so.

3. Why do they leave that little post card that reads, "Sorry we missed you" when I have been home all day. Is it laziness? Too hot to get out of the mail jeep to come knock on my door?

4. I fill out that same little post card and check off the redeliver box and specify "where" to leave my parcel in the case that I am not home. (Front porch) Two days later instead of receiving my package I am given another "Sorry we missed you" post card!

5. The Post office is 12 miles away. Gas is $2.68 per gallon. The line at the post office is 1 mile long. I paid postage and handling to the company whom I had purchased my parcel from. Why do I have to go to the Post office to get it at my own expense when I'm not on the USPS payroll?

6. Yet each month I get Ms Betsy's diabetes medicine mis-delivered in my mailbox without fail. The address label is correct yet Ms Betsy lives 8 houses down. Ms Betsy is old, has gout and makes me come in and drink rancid warm lemonade in her knick-knack cluttered, musty house every time I bring her mis-delivered parcel to her. Stop it!

7. My cat is only a furry and friendly house pet not a Saber-tooth tiger. There is no reason to toss my parcel of glass bottled fragrance oils onto my porch and haul ass running and screaming to the mail jeep.

8. Pepper spraying poor innocent kitty cats is cruel!! No wonder he doesn't like you.

9. When I place mail in my box with a note that reads, "No such person at this address" you should take note of that.

10. Stop redelivering it over and over and over again.

11. Why is it when I go to the Post Office to mail a parcel, it arrives at its destination in a timely matter.

12. But when I have a parcel picked up here at home it rarely reaches its destination and if it does, it arrives months later, despite the 1st Class Priority Delivery options that I paid for?

13. Stop it with the AOL Disks already!
Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 9:38 PM  
  • At 11:29 PM, Blogger Chris said…

    LMAO Your list had me rolling. I can difently relate to this list working for a Mail-Order Pharmacy. I've heard some of the funniest stories from customers. Very creative list. This is a must read for anyone whom has ever ordered anything that comes by the mail.

    Please check out my TT. Its up
    ALSO Check out my good friends TT. I wanna do her a favor and get atleast a 100 comments! So pass this link along to someone. I wanna see how many comments we can get her!

  • At 12:21 AM, Blogger Becky said…

    OMG! That is HILARIOUS!!! GREAT LIST! What a tool of a mail carrier you have!

  • At 12:28 AM, Blogger Tess said…

    I must say - the kitty is great! and I'm sick of aol mailings too.

  • At 12:39 AM, Blogger Wenchy said…

    Here in South Africa you just lucky if you get ya mail at all. LOL

  • At 12:39 AM, Blogger PatentPrincess said…

    LOL - hilarious list. I hate it when my mail carrier stuffs a ton of stuff (esp if it's junk mail and coupons) in my mail slot, and then when I go to open the little door it all springs out at me and all over the floor. Sooo annoying even if there's not much else the mail carrier can really do with all that mail.

    Thanks for the visit :)

  • At 1:43 AM, Blogger Christine said…

    LMAO at the POSTAL KITTY! Ya know what,I hate when I get the neighbor's mail. Why do they deliver it, if they know that person doesn't live at my address. Same delivery man for the past 6 yrs.He knows everyone who lives here.LOL, Enough allready with the AOL!

  • At 1:47 AM, Anonymous ficklechick said…

    Do we have the same mail carrier? lol

    Great list. Mine are up :)

  • At 2:13 AM, Anonymous Christine said…

    Hilarious! Makes me love my postman. In fact I'm going to write him a little love note right now. ;)

  • At 2:38 AM, Blogger Happy0303 said…

    That is just too funny! Thanks for the laughs! I love that pic of the kitty!

  • At 3:16 AM, Blogger Jen said…

    Wow, that's pretty bad!

    I HATE HATE HATE it when I get a note when I've been home all day. Why walk all the way up to my door to stick a note on it, then not knock? I swear I have good hygiene...

    Thanks for the laughs, my T13 is up!

  • At 4:06 AM, Anonymous ~ Stacy ~ said…


    So I'm not the only one with these questions running through my head, I see. Too funny. And yet, so sad.

    We had a problem with our P.O. delivering the wrong mail to several people in our neighborhood. You know, I would get Sally's mail and Sally would get Bobs, and Bob would get Jane's, and so on and so forth. So, I went in to complain and what did they do? They gave me a card to fill out which would state the names of everyone in my household that would receive mail. Huh? Shouldn't they already have this information? And, um... couldn't the postal carrier just look at the damn address section of any given piece of mail and figure it out from there? That IS what they're paid for, right?


    Yeah, I'm ready to go postal on the postal service too.

  • At 5:04 AM, Anonymous wrigley said…

    that's a funny post and a hilarious cat! haha!

    by the way, how was the digging?

  • At 6:03 AM, Blogger Norma said…

    Wow--you've got issues! I'm going to hug my carriers next time. Once in awhile we get the neighbors' mail, but that's usually a sub.

    Thanks for visiting my TT.

  • At 6:20 AM, Blogger Red said…

    Wow, I kinda like my mailman, but reading horror stories such as these makes me LOVE him!

    And did they really pepper-spray your cats? I find that outrageous, and I would certainly file a complaint about that.

    Sounds like Newman from Seinfeld delivers your mail...

  • At 7:13 AM, Blogger Jennifer said…

    Hi! First time Thirteener here. It's scary that I can relate to those. I usually get my 24 disks, but two or three times they haven't shown up as received by Blockbuster. And number 3--I just can't even stand this!

  • At 7:27 AM, Blogger Carmen said…

    A) the photo is hilarious.
    B) They pepper sprayed your cat?
    C) Call and complain. It worked for my crappy postman. :) They often didn't want to walk up the steps to leave my package. They did that with my last Harry Potter book. Dude, it says it's the new HP book on the box. I'd been waiting for 2 years. Walk up the steps!

  • At 8:09 AM, Blogger Cricket said…

    Touche! All great points. Funny, my TT mentioned the USPS, too. I just don't want them to go belly up so my NetFlix arrives.

    Thanks for visiting.

  • At 8:14 AM, Blogger k-diggity said…

    LOL..I love the list. At my job we use the USPS service...and i will be the first one to agree....THEY SUCK!!

  • At 8:33 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Know what I hate about the USPS? Aside from the fact I have a PO Box and YES they do try to make ANYTHING fit even if it says fragile, do not bend. I hate the fact (on my list no less) that on Sat, my local PO is only open from 10-12. Hello? I work 9-6 everyday but have to leave the house before they open to get to work on time!! Grr!!

  • At 8:33 AM, Anonymous Robin said…

    And I am NOT anonymous! LOL

  • At 8:34 AM, Anonymous Tricia said…

    LOL i think we have the same mail carrier! :)

  • At 8:44 AM, Blogger Lisa said…

    OMG! You poor thing! Our mail service is great here but I've had some of this happen before and it is frigging annoying!!

    Love the list, Margie! Have a good day!

  • At 8:56 AM, Blogger Andrew said…

    That's one mean looking kitten.

    AC @ bloggedy blog

  • At 9:16 AM, Blogger Mom Nancy said…

    We've lived in this house for over a year and we STILL get mail addressed to about four different names that AREN'T us! I told my husband I'm just going to keep a pen tied to the mailbox so I don't have to keep bringing those letters into the house. I'll just write "NOT AT THIS ADDRESS" and stick them back in the box. Some guy is not getting his Home Depot bills and I think, from the look of the last letter he got here, he's in big trouble.

    MY TT is up too!

  • At 9:39 AM, Anonymous Stacy said…

    What a great list, I was LOL at almost every one of your 13 items. I hope you were kidding about him pepper-spraying your kitty. That's horrible if it's true.

    Hope you get a new mail carrier soon, hehehe :)

    Have a great day!

  • At 9:55 AM, Blogger Darla said…

    Boy, do I miss our mail carrier at home, but heck, I'd almost put up with yours. Almost. Getting my mail now (I have an APO address) means driving 10 miles, going through two military checkpoints, finding parking in the overcrowded hospital parking lot, showing my ID yet again, walking a half mile through the hospital to the mail room, hoping I remember the combination, then if I have a package, waiting at the window for someone to find it, juggling packages all the way back to the car, and driving back through the gates and home again. It's about a 40-minute process on a good day. I'm tired just thinking about it.

  • At 10:15 AM, Blogger Lazy Daisy said…

    Funny list...we have a P.O. Box so don't have any of those problems.

  • At 10:36 AM, Anonymous Trina said…

    Do you think that if we all write "return to sender" on those dicks from AOL, that they might get the idea?

    My TT is up!

  • At 10:38 AM, Anonymous Naomi said…

    We have a postal carrier that doesn't deliver most Fridays. Seriously. But otherwise we get our mail okay.

    At my old place, we had a FABULOUS carrier...Ernie. He would put packages on the back patio when we were gone, ring the bell if thigns didn't fit through the slot...he was great.

  • At 10:59 AM, Blogger EmilyRoseJewel said…

    That was so funny. My stepdad is a postman and he would get a kick out of this. He really doesn't like the post office and complains about the issues with it all the time. Great list! Mine is up!

  • At 11:14 AM, Blogger Mama Duck said…

    ROTFL, #2 happens to me all the time!

  • At 11:53 AM, Anonymous Momma Bee said…

    OMG, too many of these things happen to us, too! Where we used to live, the carrier was awesome, but since we moved, it's sooo bad!

  • At 1:18 PM, Blogger Butterfly Kisses said…

    That was funny to read. Thanks for that. I am sorry you have so many issues with your mail man.

  • At 4:48 PM, Blogger Stacie said…

    OMGosh..I was laughing just a bit there, but honestly, if I had to put up with any of that, I'd go postal! I played. Stacie

  • At 5:40 PM, Blogger Natsthename said…

    I hope my brother's not your mail carrier!

    I have beefs with the USPS, too. I'm afraid to complain, though, for fear of them "going postal."

    Enjoyed your list!

  • At 7:10 PM, Blogger Maryanne said…

    OMG! How funny. You are so right. I've had all these issues with the USPS and it's nice to see I'm not the only one. Thanks for putting it together. Have a great 4th.

  • At 8:13 PM, Blogger kontan said…

    thinking of going postal on the postal worker? enjoyed your list!

  • At 8:14 PM, Blogger Mama Kelly said…

    OH I used to HATE that

    being home all day
    and getting a "sorry we missed you" notice


  • At 8:30 PM, Blogger Jo said…

    If only your mail carrier would read your blog.

  • At 1:57 AM, Blogger the_yecart said…

    That was good! What a crappy carrier you must have. I would complain to his bosses that he pepper sprayed your cat. That is the kind of thing that can get someone fired here in Canada!

    Plus, I love the suggestion to write Return To Sender on the AOL disks too!

    My TT is Up

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