Saturday, October 13, 2007
Double Speak
Heavens to Betsy! Our local newspaper's Vox Populi section is asking for some old sayings that mean a lot to us. Many of my favorite sayings have been passed down from my grandparents and parents - but there are also many that have sprouted from my own generation.

Sure one can catch more bees with honey than vinegar but you can get more bang for your buck by taking the flies on shit approach. You could stand out like a turd in a punchbowl or perhaps, be too chicken shit to stand out. Just remember, although there is a white spot on chicken shit - that white spot is chicken shit also.

If you tell me that you can catch two birds with one stone, you may be full of bologna. After all do you really know which side of the bread you've buttered?

My Grandmother used to say a good man was hard to find. Yet, in my generation it was good to find a hard man. A little bird once told me a man is known by the company he keeps, for the apple doesn't fall far from the tree. That it was better to find a man of few words than a man who is his own lawyer, having a fool for a client. Especially if he's uglier than sin.

Adding insult to injury, after all is said and done, usually more is said than actually done. All is well that ends well yet all that glitters is not gold. You'd fare much better if you get your head out of the clouds and get back to the good old days. You surely don't want to be caught with your pants down.

I've been insulted plenty of times being told I was as clumsy as a bull in a china cabinet. I couldn't hit the broad side of the barn. I had a bone in my leg, which always caught my goat for often I didn't have a leg to stand on. I've received the short end of the stick and I've given the Devil his dues. I've grown like a weed and oddly enough, at times have gone to pot.

Yet there is light at the end of the tunnel, not all sayings are so offensive. Make no bones about it for we all live and learn. Mighty oaks from little acorns grow. Many of you are as nice as pie and I love hanging around with friends who paint the town red. A few of my bloggy buds offer pearls of wisdom, one is prettier than a peach, another is queer as a three dollar bill but not that there is anything wrong with that.

A penny for your thoughts. What are some of your favorite sayings?
Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 11:10 AM  
8 Comments:
  • At 12:04 AM, Blogger bettygram said…

    You can lead a horse to water but you can not make him drink.

     
  • At 11:42 AM, Blogger Nigel St.John Regina Smegmatica Howle-Raines said…

    Here's one I like:

    Whenever I see an ambulance go by, I wish it might crash, so I could get a whiff of that oxygen.

    Words to live by!

     
  • At 5:44 AM, Blogger Carlos said…

    My grandfather used to tell me something when I was young. He used to say, "Get the fuck out of my way boy!"

    Stole that from George Carlin.

    I can't think of anything special, hence the smartass post ;-)

     
  • At 12:59 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Hey Dahling

    My limerick for the day:
    There was once a young maid from Hong Kong,
    Who said to her lover How Fong,
    I deny my vagina is the biggest in China!
    Its your chop-stick whats wong!

     
  • At 3:08 PM, Blogger Flyinfox_SATX said…

    I like to know why people park in driveways and drive on parkways...

    And while we are at it with limericks:

    There once was a man named Dave
    Who found a dead Ho in a cave
    She was ugly as shit
    And missing a tit
    But think of the money he saved!

    Flyinfox_SATX

     
  • At 7:29 PM, Blogger Dr.John said…

    The only luck I have is no luck at all.

     
  • At 4:42 AM, Blogger doctor chip said…

    you know, back in the day, I would have been all over this post like white on rice, or maybe like stink on shit; but, now,
    the cat's got my tongue, and the fact of the matter
    is that if you wish in one hand and shit in the other,
    we all know which hand will fill up first
    .

    that being said, I think we should just
    let bygones be bygones, since it's better
    to take it like a man, now that
    the cat's out of the bag.

    I don't mean to pour salt into an open wound
    or anything, but sometimes ya gotta go ahead and
    kick 'em while they're down, 'cause
    it ain't over 'til the Fat Lady sings...
    ...and, once she's done, you can
    tell 'em to go piss up a rope.

    now, excuse me please,
    I'm gonna go take a hike...

    ... and, if I'm lucky, I won't--

    -- get lost.

    yup.

    B-)

    -----------

     
  • At 3:40 PM, Blogger Woozie said…

    My favorite:

    "Enough is enough! I have had it with these motherfucking snakes on this motherfucking plane!"

    "This is Sparta!" and "Tonight We Dine In Hell!" are close seconds.

     
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