Friday, November 10, 2006
Bergermeister Meisterberger Files (Episode One)

With Christmas just around the corner,
It's a difficult responsibility
That we extract from the Number One Law keeper,
Bergermeister Meisterberger.
That certain Toys are hereby declared Illegal, immoral, unlawful
Anyone found with such a toy in his/her possession
Will be placed under arrest and thrown in the dungeon!

For our first hideous, immoral and unlawful Toy of the season allow me to advise you to stay clear of the Walmart .88 cent toy section. In this section you will find this seemingly innocent looking Barbie knock-off. Made in China and marketed as a "Hero Figure"

Besides the fact that her hair is so sparse that she appears to have a bad case of mange. We could ignore the fact that below her head is a body the color of a grayish-blue dead person. We can even look past the incorrect placement of certain unmentionable body parts. What we cannot ignore is Knock-Off Barbie's list of accessories...

11 1/2 inch Posable Action Figure with Weapons & Gear!! Yes folks you've heard it first here. That grayish-blue matter is because she is created from depleted uranium. Those pretty little pink, blue and yellow hair barrettes are in reality unexploded ordinances from a left over cluster bomb.

This product is hereby deemed unlawful by the order of the Bergermeister!
Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 5:00 PM  
  • At 8:21 PM, Blogger Pawlie Kokonuts said…

    Why do they mean by 'posable'? Able to be a poseur? Able to pose? Or is it all a misspelling for possible? Just wond'rin'.

  • At 8:34 PM, Blogger Margaret said…

    I'm sure they meant to assume a position or posture. I checked the dictionary to see if it was a word and it is. Sure doesn't sound right though.

  • At 9:51 PM, Blogger The Little Woman said…

    I would love to know her poses... G rated? PG rated? Dare I continue with MY imagination?!

    Maybe her weapon is that of most feminists...the ability to cut the balls off of a man in ten seconds flat...maybe it's her PMS...

    Now, as for my blog - should you really be giving me ideas? Is that safe? Is that legal?

    Probably not but perfectly amusing!

  • At 12:39 AM, Blogger Chana said…

    the whole post is full of things to respond to,,but my mind is still spinning over your one sentence..

    'Walmart .88 cent toy section' what????? walmarts here don't have much in the $5 range...we don't have the big superstores either..they are coming i hear to Toronto and it is a huge fuzz all over the country and are considering whether the rest of Canada may get them...???
    a present for under a buck? even a bad

    if we are lucky you find a good one dollar store..and not the usual dollar plus, in which it ends up being the price of any regular store..

    oh poor you, here i went into a rant..sorry just got stuck in that price when i talk to my family in LA and they tell me of some prices,, I...oh here i go again lol..

    sweet dreams..

  • At 2:55 AM, Blogger Deepak Gopi said…


  • At 7:52 AM, Blogger Karlos said…

    OMG that’s freakin’ hilarious!!!! Did you really find that yourself in a Wal Mart? I was at Wal Mart yesterday and would love to have bought one just for the hell of it!

  • At 9:51 AM, Blogger Dr.John said…

    Now what am I going to do with this thing. I was going to use it as a PIC a Prize but now that it is not legal. I will have to find some other use. Perhaps as a doorstop.

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