Monday, June 18, 2007
To My Heavenly Father
My Mom brought me to You when I was just 2 months old. Partly due to ritual and sacrament, but most importantly to dedicate herself to a promise. A promise to raise me to know You, to trust You and to love You. I'm here to witness that Mom did well and kept her commitment despite the obstacles and challenges before her.

Only You, Lord - know the heart of my Dad. Only You, may judge him. I confess that I do not have the strength to forgive him nor the faith to trust in him ever again. Please forgive me and please take this heavy heartache and dishonor that I have carried in my heart for 39 years. I no longer wish to carry it.

Instead, I am thankful in part for all I had endured. Maybe my blog readers will laugh at me, maybe they won't - but to have been a lonely, abused, hurt and confused child did have it's privileges. I didn't have an imaginary friend as a kid, I had You.

I used to pretend that You were there, sitting upon my bed as I shared my news of the day. We would sing and color together. You would push me on the swing set and comfort me when I skinned my little knees. It was You that held the back of my bike seat after we managed to take off the training wheels all by ourselves.

Later as a teen, I didn't forget You. Sure, there were many times when I made You stay home and not go with me when I went to hang out with my friends or planned to get into mischief. You were sad, but You never stopped me. You always waited patiently for me to come home and eventually got me to confess and be honest about my behaviors.

Then there were times that I was embarrassed by You, Father. It's not that You were corny, wore funny clothes or embarrassed me in front of my friends. It was because to a handful of my friends, You were invisible back then as You are today, and many have laughed or jeered at me for my faith and beliefs.

I don't mind anymore and I love to let You ride shotgun on my daily errands and go abouts. To guide me, to listen to me and to have your presence even during long moments of solemn silence. I know that You are always there. You live and You live forever!

Often I'm reminded of the 8 year old little girl Virginia O'Hanlon who wrote to the editor of the New York Times to find out the truth. Is there really a Santa Clause? In part:

"...You may tear apart the baby's rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived, could tear apart. Only faith, fancy, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, VIRGINIA, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding..."

Your Bible says in Matthew 18:4,5 "Truly I tell you, unless you change and become like little children, you will never get into the kingdom of heaven. Therefore, whoever humbles himself as this little child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven, and whoever receives a little child like this in my name receives me."

On this Father's Day I would like to thank You, my heavenly father. Despite all I had to endure and go through, today I am able and do know the love of a Perfect Father.

Thank you.


Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 7:33 PM  
  • At 7:53 PM, Blogger Dr.John said…

    It was good to see the miracle of faith in the heavenly Father despite the failure of an earthly father. Thank you for your testimony.

  • At 6:03 AM, Blogger Orhan Kahn said…

    Simply beautiful.

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