Friday, December 22, 2006
After receiving an email about "The Man Code" I sit here wondering what a "Woman Code" would look like. I can't think of nearly as many Girl-to-Girl rules and regulations.

Wonder if that is good, suggesting us Gals are confident and laid back? Or maybe it is a bad thing suggesting that Gals are cruel and cold-hearted drama Queens? Stopping at no costs to miss out bringing on Drama even at the cost of our best friends tears and emotions.

Here is "The Man Code Revisited" (Altered to include the Code of Women.)


Thou shall not rent the movie Chocolate.

Woman Code: Watch any movie that you please. If you don't like it then make use of this time to manicure your nails or get back into that great novel you've been reading.

Under no circumstances may 2 men share an umbrella.

Woman Code: Get as many heads under the umbrella as you can. Keep in mind all single and eligible ladies have first dibs to keep their doo dry. Just in case they'll run into Mr. Right later that day.

When you are queried by a buddy's wife, girlfriend, mother,
father, priest, shrink, dentist, accountant, or dog walker,
you need not and should not provide any useful information
whatsoever as to his whereabouts. You are permitted to deny
his very existence.

Woman Code: Very simular except once the person asking is out of sight, quickly phone your circle of friends and give them the heads up that a drama situation may be afoot and start the gossip ball rolling.

You may exaggerate any anecdote told in a bar by 50 percent
without recrimination; beyond that, anyone within earshot is
allowed to call BULLSHIT. (Exception: When trying to pick up
a girl, the allowable exaggeration rate rises to 400 percent).

Woman Code: Oh no, do not under any circumstances become a lying bitch.

If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister
is off-limits forever.

Woman Code: Friend's brothers are ALWAYS fair game. Just think, you could end up sisters if you play your cards right.

The minimum amount of time you have to wait for another guy
who's running late is 5 minutes. For a girl, you are required
to wait 10 minutes for every point of hotness she scores on
the classic 1-10 babe scale.

Woman Code: Wait at least 30 minutes for a girlfriend and then call to see what is holding her up. For a guy, never stand there waiting for him to show up, it shows that you are desparate.

No man is ever required to buy a birthday present for
another man. In fact, even remembering a friends birthday is
strictly optional and slightly gay.

Woman Code: Never ever forget a friends birthday! Chances are her husband and/or boyfriend won't remember and she will need a shoulder to cry on about it.

Before dating a buddy's "ex", you are required to ask his
permission and he in return is required to grant it.

Woman Code: Never! Ex's are off limits all across the board.

If a man's zipper is down, that's his problem--you didn't
see nothin'.

Woman Code: If a man's zipper is down, you must point it out to everyone else standing in the room so everyone can laugh at him.

A man must never own a cat or like his girlfriend's cat.

Woman Code: If your cat doesn't like your new boyfriend, by all means listen to your cat!
Stumble It! .......posted by Margaret @ 3:29 PM  
  • At 5:17 PM, Anonymous happy and blue 2 said…

    Wow..I never knew girls were so strange, ha,ha..

  • At 3:40 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    "Friend's brothers are ALWAYS fair game. Just think, you could end up sisters if you play your cards right."

    haha I love that one. ;)

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